- Are those really bad pictures of Beyonce? Can there be a bad picture of Beyonce? I don’t think so. Suck it up.
- Chris Brown is cursed. And he looks anorexic.
- Lady Gaga: does anyone still give a fuck?
- Monopoly piece: this is news?
- North Korea: why don’t we just seize the motherfuckers already?
Thursday, February 7, 2013
Some thoughts after viewing my Gawker RSS feed
Friday, February 1, 2013
Man, I wish I was a celebrity (warning: breastfeeding discussion)
It's not what you think--I have no delusions. Sometimes I wish I were a celebrity so that I could tell people to fucking shut UP already.
Apparently some woman named Kristen Cavallari (who is famous despite the fact that I've never heard of her) was quoted in an article saying that she stopped breastfeeding because she felt like a slave to the pump, and some lactivists got their knickers in a twist over it, calling her a bad mother, saying that she's selfishly denied bonding to her kid, yadda yadda.
Hello people, she did breastfeed for 6 months, and that's good, right? Well apparently it's not good enough. I am so sick to death of breastfeeding fascists who do not shrink from pointing out how you've failed your child by not breastfeeding them as long as humanly possible. These people are just as bad, IMHO, as people who want to ban abortions and whatnot--both are consumed with telling women what to do based on their idea of what is "right" instead of respectfully letting nature take its course.
On the other side, I've heard the view expressed that breastfeeding is the socio-politico-industrial complex's (aka "The Man's") way of keeping women tied to the home instead of to their careers. No, I'm not making this up. This was someone I know's overarching justification for NOT breastfeeding.
What do we learn from this? That's right, there's paranoids on both sides! I don't want to use the 'F' word, but it seems to me that in order to get beyond so-called feminism, we need to stop telling women what to do. And in particular, women need to stop being so nasty to one another.
I did love breastfeeding, and am proud that I was able to do it for 7 months. But I will not lie--I was relieved when it was finally over. Breastfeeding is freakin' hard work. Have you seen a dog wean her puppies? She literally runs away from them, repeatedly, in an effort to get them to stop sucking on her already.
While it is awesome to bond with and nourish your baby, once you get past the warm and tingly aspects, it's boring and demands a ton of the mother's time. There, I said it. I remember a short period of not being able to sleep more than a few hours at a time because the baby had to eat...and I was the only one able to feed her. Sleeping with my baby wasn't in the cards for me because of my c-section (couldn't get upstairs to our bed so I slept on the couch next to bassinet), and I don't think I would have rested well anyway.
I would go so far as to say that breastfeeding was the single hardest thing I've ever done, because it required commitment, attention, energy, consistency, and time. Which means, there were sacrifices made by me for sure--but I made the choice to breastfeed and I stuck to it. In the beginning I pumped so much extra that my husband was able to give her bottles at night, which gave me a much-needed break. Towards the end, I pumped in the office for a while, but when it seemed baby wasn't getting enough, I started supplementing with formula, and it was over shortly after that. I would do it again in a heartbeat for the next baby, for sure, but would try to enjoy it more and not stress as much about prolonging it. And I would definitely invest in a better pump.
Like so many things, you just don't realize how much demand breastfeeding places on you until you're done with it. As mothers in the 21st century, are we still expected to give every ounce of ourselves over to our babies? I say, that's every mother's call to make for themselves. Whole generations of babies weren't breastfed and breastfeeding nearly died out because of it--and yet society survived. The reality is, we aren't hunter-gatherers anymore, able to strap our babies to our teats for hours on end, we have jobs and responsibilities, and no one needs to martyr themselves or pat themselves on the back for being 'superior' because they were able to do something that not everyone can.
Instead of these stupid arguments that pit mothers against one another, as women we should be encouraging an environment in which women feel free to do things as they see fit, without harsh, self-aggrandizing judgments by other women.
Apparently some woman named Kristen Cavallari (who is famous despite the fact that I've never heard of her) was quoted in an article saying that she stopped breastfeeding because she felt like a slave to the pump, and some lactivists got their knickers in a twist over it, calling her a bad mother, saying that she's selfishly denied bonding to her kid, yadda yadda.
Hello people, she did breastfeed for 6 months, and that's good, right? Well apparently it's not good enough. I am so sick to death of breastfeeding fascists who do not shrink from pointing out how you've failed your child by not breastfeeding them as long as humanly possible. These people are just as bad, IMHO, as people who want to ban abortions and whatnot--both are consumed with telling women what to do based on their idea of what is "right" instead of respectfully letting nature take its course.
On the other side, I've heard the view expressed that breastfeeding is the socio-politico-industrial complex's (aka "The Man's") way of keeping women tied to the home instead of to their careers. No, I'm not making this up. This was someone I know's overarching justification for NOT breastfeeding.
What do we learn from this? That's right, there's paranoids on both sides! I don't want to use the 'F' word, but it seems to me that in order to get beyond so-called feminism, we need to stop telling women what to do. And in particular, women need to stop being so nasty to one another.
I did love breastfeeding, and am proud that I was able to do it for 7 months. But I will not lie--I was relieved when it was finally over. Breastfeeding is freakin' hard work. Have you seen a dog wean her puppies? She literally runs away from them, repeatedly, in an effort to get them to stop sucking on her already.
While it is awesome to bond with and nourish your baby, once you get past the warm and tingly aspects, it's boring and demands a ton of the mother's time. There, I said it. I remember a short period of not being able to sleep more than a few hours at a time because the baby had to eat...and I was the only one able to feed her. Sleeping with my baby wasn't in the cards for me because of my c-section (couldn't get upstairs to our bed so I slept on the couch next to bassinet), and I don't think I would have rested well anyway.
I would go so far as to say that breastfeeding was the single hardest thing I've ever done, because it required commitment, attention, energy, consistency, and time. Which means, there were sacrifices made by me for sure--but I made the choice to breastfeed and I stuck to it. In the beginning I pumped so much extra that my husband was able to give her bottles at night, which gave me a much-needed break. Towards the end, I pumped in the office for a while, but when it seemed baby wasn't getting enough, I started supplementing with formula, and it was over shortly after that. I would do it again in a heartbeat for the next baby, for sure, but would try to enjoy it more and not stress as much about prolonging it. And I would definitely invest in a better pump.
Like so many things, you just don't realize how much demand breastfeeding places on you until you're done with it. As mothers in the 21st century, are we still expected to give every ounce of ourselves over to our babies? I say, that's every mother's call to make for themselves. Whole generations of babies weren't breastfed and breastfeeding nearly died out because of it--and yet society survived. The reality is, we aren't hunter-gatherers anymore, able to strap our babies to our teats for hours on end, we have jobs and responsibilities, and no one needs to martyr themselves or pat themselves on the back for being 'superior' because they were able to do something that not everyone can.
Instead of these stupid arguments that pit mothers against one another, as women we should be encouraging an environment in which women feel free to do things as they see fit, without harsh, self-aggrandizing judgments by other women.
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