Why Chickin Stew?

A few words about my new blog. Yes, I realize that the word 'chicken' is spelled wrong, but the correct spelling was already taken, thank you very much.

You see, some douche bag already reserved chickenstew.blogspot.com. If you go there, all it says is 'My blog bitch.' There is no way to email, comment, or in any way contact Crazyface, the would-be blogger who owns this site, because you know that I would have. Initially I was so frustrated by this that I thought this Crazyface was taunting me specifically, of course, because who else but me would want a blog titled Chicken Stew? But someone apparently does want that blog address, just so that they can throw it away and give me and anyone else who wants that address, a big 'f-u.'

But I've come to like my alternate spelling. It has one alternate meaning I hadn't intended--'chick in stew,' which is totally fine, if a bit cheesy and obvious. I don't really "do" post-feminist chick jokes, but whatever.

Why write a blog in the first place? This is something I've been struggling with my entire blogging life--which hit five years this December. Till now, I've been blogging mostly in secret in a kind of online private journal--oxymoronic I know. Chickin Stew is my attempt to bring my blogging public, baby steps at a time. The ultimate goal of this blog for me is to somehow reconcile all of the different aspects of myself in one spot, without apology. And, sorry, Penelope Trunk, my main reason for blogging is for my own amusement. Whether or not others even read what I blog, or if they read, enjoy what they read and/or are edified by it--is not my primary concern. At least not right now.

We are all different people to different people, and, knowing this, for too long I have tried to keep parts of myself separate, afraid of cross-pollution, of people in one group finding out my opinions in another group, etc. I no longer want to apologize for what I think or write, or hide my interests, opinions, or the crap that I think about from certain people. I realize that no one has been asking me to keep these parts of myself separate--mine has been a self-imposed isolation, and that's the habit I want to break--my own self-policing tendencies--and blog about what I know. We all contain many facets to our personalities, and no one but fictional characters can act in a consistent and predictable manner. Why should I expect that of myself? If people judge me based on one blog post, that's their problem.