So in the past few weeks, I have 'discovered' rap. That's right, rap. A friend gave me a copy of the newest Kanye West album, and ever since, I have found myself increasingly interested, not only in his music, but in his persona.
I confess I have always dismissed rap out-of-hand as 'not for me' until listening to this album. It is completely different from any music I have listened to, ever, and I think that's part of the appeal. It doesn't hurt that Kanye's style is a bit more accessible than other rappers I've heard bits and pieces of. He has a keen sense of melody and storytelling, which I always appreciate.
I've been consuming music at an alarmingly jaded rate these past few years, and my enjoyment of indie rock and the like has waned because of it. Lately, I have been more into pop music, especially dance music, ever since I started going to Zumba (I know how it sounds, but my sister-in-law teaches it, and it ain't your grandma's Zumba). The dance music is definitely linked to the escape I get when I dance in my hip-hop Zumba class, but the rap, well, the rap is providing a very different form of escape for me.
Oh, I know how it looks, and I'm a little self-conscious about it. I am a mid-30s, middle class white girl from the South who works a white-collar job, who drives around downtown Schenectady in her Elantra with the doors locked (locking my doors upon entry is a habit I picked up when living in New Orleans), with rap beats emanating from my car. I know, it's completely absurd. What could I possibly get from listening to a music that was not intended for me in any shape or form, that doesn't speak to my reality or my race or my here and now? I think I just answered that in formulating the question, but I'll attempt to explain further.
I am fascinated by this music because it is so brazenly honest and in your face, and I suspect that is what draws many so-called white people to rap music. There is no pretense, no protocol, no curse words to shy away from, no Ps and Qs to mind, no feelings to worry about hurting. Kanye appears to say exactly what is on his mind, but does so in a way that can be goofy, charming, brilliant, and downright nasty by turns. It is fresh and intriguing to my old ears that have listened to years upon years of structured, guitar-driven, thoughtful, melodic, witty, depressing, esoteric rock and pop music in their lifetime. When I turn on Kanye and that attitude starts flowing, it's a welcome relief after putting up with other people's bullshit all day long.
I'm still fairly new, but so far his early albums seem to revolve around black-centric issues, it's true, but the subjects are very relatable no matter what your race--heartbreak, loving your mother, other people's expectations (or lack thereof), working shit jobs for no money, escapism, and the like. His new one--well, the misogyny and prevalent mentions of pussy I at times find off-putting (I can't listen to that song 'Blame Game, ever), but musically it is very complex and interesting.
We will see how far my new interest in rap extends. This might be a fixation on Kanye West specifically, or it could expand to other rappers. Only time will tell, and I can be a fickle bitch.
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